On Being Denounced, Britney Spears, and Honest Abe
What does it mean to be denounced?
Throughout history, no shortage of people have been denounced. It seems that at one time or another, even the best of us have suffered denouncements.
Since America is the best country in the world, we should look to ourselves for awesome people who may have been denounced. And what better place to look for these exceptional people than to our currency, the thing that America has more of than any other country. (FN1). But how to narrow it down? Now, I don't know about you, but to me, appearing on either a coin or a bill is no small feat - JFK, RFK, FDR, Ike, Franklin, US Grant, Hamilton, Jackson, Susan B. Anthony, Sacagawea, the Liberty Bell, and Lady Liberty have all done that at one time or another. And starting in 2007, every (deceased) President will be eventually featured on a dollar coin. (FN2). I'll admit, a lot of those people and objects are pretty cool, but I just can't honestly say that being on a single piece of US currency is that big of a deal anymore. I just can't.
But only three have been and continue to be featured on both a coin and a bill. That's an exclusive club whose members are Washington, Jefferson, and Lincoln. And let's not forget, those are three of the four Presidents whose faces adorn Mt. Rushmore (the other is Teddy Roosevelt). (FN3). These are also three of the four Presidents with major memorials or monuments in Washington D.C. (the other being Franklin Delano Roosevelt. Albert Einstein also has a memorial in D.C.) (FN4). If you aren't persuaded yet, then all is lost.
Now, since I promised I'd talk about denouncements, that's what I'm going to do. Washington, Jefferson, and Lincoln were all great folks who all happened to be denounced at one time or another.
George Washington, who appears on the Dollar Bill and the Quarter, was denounced as being aristocratic (FN5). Thomas Jefferson, who appears on the Two Dollar Bill and the Nickel, was denounced for completing the Louisiana Purchase (FN4) and for being an atheiest (FN5) and infidel (FN6). Even Abraham Lincoln, who appears on the Five Dollar Bill and the Penny, was denounced in 1864 for vetoing the Wade-Davis Bill. (FN7). But Honest Abe (who reportedly earned this nickname for being an honest judge of cockfights FN8, FN9, FN10) also did some denouncing of his own, denouncing the Mexican-American War while he was a member of Congress in the 1840s. (FN11) This, of course, earned him some denoucements, where he was denounced as a traitor. (FN12)
Let's stick with Abe for the time being. My point is, just because Abe Lincoln was a great person who happened to be denounced a few times, it doesn't mean everyone who is denounced is really a great person. . . or even a good person. No, many people who are denounced are denounced for good or even great reasons. Especially where my denouncements are concerned. I only denouce those who are deserving of such a harsh rebuke - like Britney Spears.
Let's compare Honest Abe and Britney Spears for a minute. Honest Abe and Britney Spears are worlds apart.
Let's start with their names. Abraham Lincoln and Britney Spears. Abraham was the founding patriarch of the Israelites, who God chose to bless out of all the families on earth, and is considered a major Christian, Jewish, and Muslim figure (FN13). Britney is a misspelling of Brittany and it sounds like 'brat'.
Then, you've got their nicknames. Honest Abe and Britney. Come on. And if that's not convincing enough, Abe was also known as "The Great Emancipator" and "The Rail Splitter". (FN14). Any normal person would be content with one of these three nicknames. The fact that Abe had all three is a testament to his heroic nature.
Let's delve deeper. One saved the Union of these United States (FN15), the other can't even take care of her own baby - she drops him (FN16), allegedly lets him fall out of bed (FN17) lets nanies watch him . . . who also drop him (FN18) - leaving me to think she taught the nanny how to drop the baby; plus, drives with the baby on her lap contrary to what common sense would dictate (FN19), and God knows what else.
Abraham Lincoln has a monument in Washington, D.C. (FN20), his picture on the penny (FN21) and $5 bill (FN22), and the picture of his monument on the back of those denominations of currency (FN23, FN24). Not to mention the undying thanks of the American people. And Abe is praised abroad, too - during three weeks in spent in Cuba, I saw no less than three busts or statues of Abe Lincoln. And one was in the Museum of the Revolution in Havana - that's like holy land for the Cuban government. Put simply, Abe is so damned awesome everybody likes him, even communists.
All Britney Spears gets is her airbrushed picture on the cover of some crappy no-good magazines like Star (FN25), People (FN26), US Weekly (FN27) and Harpar's Bazaar (FN28), a bizarre statue of her giving birth (You really should see the pictures: FN29, FN30), a tattoo that doesn't mean anything (FN31), a tattoo that means the wrong thing (but 'strange' does seem to describe her) (FN32 FN33), and a visit from child welfare services. (FN34). Sounds like a winner to me!
The differences are clear and the conclusion obvious. Denouncements of Abraham Lincoln are profound errors of judgment. Denouncements of Britney Spears are well-deserved and necessary.
Earlier I posed the question, "What does it mean to be denounced?" The answer is clear. It depends on who is being denounced. Some denouncements are meritless put-downs of another, like denouncements of Abe. Some denouncements are unapologetic and forceful indictments of an individual whose very existence should be a criminal offense. My denouncements all fit into the latter category.
Throughout history, no shortage of people have been denounced. It seems that at one time or another, even the best of us have suffered denouncements.
Since America is the best country in the world, we should look to ourselves for awesome people who may have been denounced. And what better place to look for these exceptional people than to our currency, the thing that America has more of than any other country. (FN1). But how to narrow it down? Now, I don't know about you, but to me, appearing on either a coin or a bill is no small feat - JFK, RFK, FDR, Ike, Franklin, US Grant, Hamilton, Jackson, Susan B. Anthony, Sacagawea, the Liberty Bell, and Lady Liberty have all done that at one time or another. And starting in 2007, every (deceased) President will be eventually featured on a dollar coin. (FN2). I'll admit, a lot of those people and objects are pretty cool, but I just can't honestly say that being on a single piece of US currency is that big of a deal anymore. I just can't.
But only three have been and continue to be featured on both a coin and a bill. That's an exclusive club whose members are Washington, Jefferson, and Lincoln. And let's not forget, those are three of the four Presidents whose faces adorn Mt. Rushmore (the other is Teddy Roosevelt). (FN3). These are also three of the four Presidents with major memorials or monuments in Washington D.C. (the other being Franklin Delano Roosevelt. Albert Einstein also has a memorial in D.C.) (FN4). If you aren't persuaded yet, then all is lost.
Now, since I promised I'd talk about denouncements, that's what I'm going to do. Washington, Jefferson, and Lincoln were all great folks who all happened to be denounced at one time or another.
George Washington, who appears on the Dollar Bill and the Quarter, was denounced as being aristocratic (FN5). Thomas Jefferson, who appears on the Two Dollar Bill and the Nickel, was denounced for completing the Louisiana Purchase (FN4) and for being an atheiest (FN5) and infidel (FN6). Even Abraham Lincoln, who appears on the Five Dollar Bill and the Penny, was denounced in 1864 for vetoing the Wade-Davis Bill. (FN7). But Honest Abe (who reportedly earned this nickname for being an honest judge of cockfights FN8, FN9, FN10) also did some denouncing of his own, denouncing the Mexican-American War while he was a member of Congress in the 1840s. (FN11) This, of course, earned him some denoucements, where he was denounced as a traitor. (FN12)
Let's stick with Abe for the time being. My point is, just because Abe Lincoln was a great person who happened to be denounced a few times, it doesn't mean everyone who is denounced is really a great person. . . or even a good person. No, many people who are denounced are denounced for good or even great reasons. Especially where my denouncements are concerned. I only denouce those who are deserving of such a harsh rebuke - like Britney Spears.
Let's compare Honest Abe and Britney Spears for a minute. Honest Abe and Britney Spears are worlds apart.
Let's start with their names. Abraham Lincoln and Britney Spears. Abraham was the founding patriarch of the Israelites, who God chose to bless out of all the families on earth, and is considered a major Christian, Jewish, and Muslim figure (FN13). Britney is a misspelling of Brittany and it sounds like 'brat'.
Then, you've got their nicknames. Honest Abe and Britney. Come on. And if that's not convincing enough, Abe was also known as "The Great Emancipator" and "The Rail Splitter". (FN14). Any normal person would be content with one of these three nicknames. The fact that Abe had all three is a testament to his heroic nature.
Let's delve deeper. One saved the Union of these United States (FN15), the other can't even take care of her own baby - she drops him (FN16), allegedly lets him fall out of bed (FN17) lets nanies watch him . . . who also drop him (FN18) - leaving me to think she taught the nanny how to drop the baby; plus, drives with the baby on her lap contrary to what common sense would dictate (FN19), and God knows what else.
Abraham Lincoln has a monument in Washington, D.C. (FN20), his picture on the penny (FN21) and $5 bill (FN22), and the picture of his monument on the back of those denominations of currency (FN23, FN24). Not to mention the undying thanks of the American people. And Abe is praised abroad, too - during three weeks in spent in Cuba, I saw no less than three busts or statues of Abe Lincoln. And one was in the Museum of the Revolution in Havana - that's like holy land for the Cuban government. Put simply, Abe is so damned awesome everybody likes him, even communists.
All Britney Spears gets is her airbrushed picture on the cover of some crappy no-good magazines like Star (FN25), People (FN26), US Weekly (FN27) and Harpar's Bazaar (FN28), a bizarre statue of her giving birth (You really should see the pictures: FN29, FN30), a tattoo that doesn't mean anything (FN31), a tattoo that means the wrong thing (but 'strange' does seem to describe her) (FN32 FN33), and a visit from child welfare services. (FN34). Sounds like a winner to me!
The differences are clear and the conclusion obvious. Denouncements of Abraham Lincoln are profound errors of judgment. Denouncements of Britney Spears are well-deserved and necessary.
Earlier I posed the question, "What does it mean to be denounced?" The answer is clear. It depends on who is being denounced. Some denouncements are meritless put-downs of another, like denouncements of Abe. Some denouncements are unapologetic and forceful indictments of an individual whose very existence should be a criminal offense. My denouncements all fit into the latter category.
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